ALDI Supermarket
2651 S. Vineland Dr.
Vineland, NJ
08360
Dear Aldi Supermarket,
I am writing to get the OK to set up a table in your cereal aisle during the week of February 5th. The table will be made of Oak. It is a table that I bought at Anne of Green Tables on rt. 4 (NOT the rt. 9 store – I am banned). It is a cute table. The table is rectangular. It glows in the dark. One time my dog humped one of the table legs. So did my uncle. This table will now be in your lobby on March 17th. With a sign. The sign shall read: “Supermarket Toll”. Whenever shoppers pass, I shall demand they pay a toll. I will be dressed in a bear suit. The toll will be $7 dollars cash money (I will also accept Disney Dollars).
To review, my plan is this:
1. Put a giant table in your store
2. Collect money from your customers
3. Wear the bear suit
Please let me know that you are on board with this. I am only doing it to impress my dog.
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